RISING DAMP

“Why do we play this impossible game, Miss Jones?”

“Oh but Mr Rigsby, I thought you enjoyed the gentle intellectual tussle and the meeting of minds?”

“Oh I do Miss Jones, indeed I do, most certainly. There’s nothing I enjoy more than a meeting and a tussle.”

“It’s so much about margins, Mr Rigsby. You mustn’t let Alan and Philip wind you up so. Look at the board where you played in 2S and made 11 tricks. They laughed at you for not even being in game, didn’t they?”

“It doesn’t affect me Miss Jones, oh no. Water off a duck’s back. Anyway there was nothing else I could do, and you couldn’t bid.”

“Well, actually, there was something else you could have done…”
“Oh? Really, Miss Jones? And what was that then?”

“Well, you see, Alan opened 1N, you bid 2S then All Pass. It could have been so different:

AQ863

AQJ8

A

J73

754                                                J92

K2                                                653

QJ86                                                K93

AK86                                                T942

                        KT

                        T974

T7542

Q5

You made +200 for 11 tricks. But see what happens if – instead of bidding 2S – you Double.”

“But why would I do that Miss Jones?”

“So that your partner can tell you have a good hand. So you can possibly take them for a nice juicy penalty. You’d like that wouldn’t you Mr Rigsby.”

“I certainly would Miss Jones, oh yes, I certainly would. Please continue.”

“After 1NT all simple overcalls of a suit promise LESS than 15 HCP, let’s say about 8 -14; and all Doubles in that position promise 15 or MORE. The Double of 1NT is not like a Take-out double of a suit. It is primarily suggestive of penalties. If you start with a double, Philip, in the East seat, has really no good bid to make. (Unless they’ve agreed some sophisticated defence to your double). I should probably pass and then Alan also has no sensible bid now. You lead a low Spade, I win with the K and then I have to think. Instead of lamely returning a S at trick 2, I look at dummy and see the H suit looks empty. I’m probably never getting the lead again so I must make my move now.”

“Oh yes, please do Miss Jones..”

“I return the HT, trapping Alan’s HK under your AQJ8, you cash the rest of the Spades and the DA giving us 10 Tricks. Doubled! Alan is now 4 Down Doubled for 800! Better than 200. Better even than if we had bid the game for 450.”

“But what if they do start bidding something? They might end up in 2C?”

“In which case with your big hand you Double again. This time they only go 3 off for 500. Still better than any game we make.”

“But what if the Vulnerability’s different?”

“If they are Vulnerable we now get 1100 or 800. Even better!”

Miss Jones is right – as usual. And even if you’re Vulnerable and they’re NV you still do better getting 800. Remember: after 1NT: – X shows any hand 15+.

DEFENDING : LEADS

"Defending is tough, Jim - real tough." Davy Crockett, King of the wild frontier, was taking time out from defending the Alamo to discuss his favourite game with Jim Bowie. "Sometimes you gotta have eyes in the back of yer head."
"You gotta see through the back o' those darn cards n' all, Davy," said Jim, carefully polishing his long weapon.
"The hardest bit," drawled Davy, "is the dang openin' lead. The helluva thing is you got no idea what's right."
"Uh, yeah, well…" interrupted Jim, "Though you do got the auction, Davy. You kin learn good from that. What the shapes of declarer's hand might be an' all sorts innneresting stuff like that."
"True words, Jim, true words indeed. Which is why you should always pay very close attention to an auction, even if you ain't involved in it. While they're bidding themselves stupid to their cosy little grand slam or whatever, you need to be startin' up a plan of attack even before the auction is over. Listen to it. Study the hell out of it. Git yerself all prepared and ready - then Bam! Attack!"
"Then you gotta make that choice - the Opening Lead." Jim grew serious. Davy's brow furrowed.
" That is why, Jim Bowie, you gotta learn, or at least be familiar with, the table of standard leads. Thataways, dang partner will at least, mebbe, have some dang idea of what yer doin' and why yer doin' it. 
First, decide from the auction and your holdings the best suit to lead. THEN, decide which card is "right":
1) Top of a sequence.
2) Top of a doubleton
3) Middle from 3 small (MUD)
4) 4th best -  FROM AN HONOUR!!!!!
5) 2nd best from rubbish
6) Bottom of 3 to an honour
You may still be leadin' blind in the pitch black to a deaf partner, but, hey - you tried…and you did the right thing."

THE RIGHT ATTITUDE

"As I've said before," said Spock, "killing partner is not necessary or helpful. And it ruins the baize..."

"But, but, but.. " said the very large Klingon, dropping his partner, "Twice he didn't continue the suit he led at trick one. We coulda had them down twice. That is not acceptable on my planet. He needs to know my attitude to failure, know what I'm saying?"

"I think he'd rather know your attitude to the suit led, wouldn't he?"

"Huh? Are you implying it's all my fault?"

"Yes that's right I am indeed. You could have an agreement that the card played by opening leader's partner, when not forced to play high, can be an ATTITUDE signal. ie whether or not you want partner to continue that suit when they can. Say partner leads QS against 3NT and you hold 109653 in the suit. If Dummy (or Declarer)  wins the trick, now your card can be attitude showing. The 9 will encourage partner to continue the suit later, and the 3 will be discouraging. Now partner knows what to do. Simple huh?"

"Hmm maybe. But what if you only have one valuable high card to play to encourage with? That's a problem, no?"

"It is indeed. Very well spotted. This is why a lot of players actually play what's called REVERSE ATTITUDE. ie a LOW  card is encouraging, the high one discouraging (Hi hate, Lo like...) In the previous example the 3 would be encouraging. You will of course have to watch every single card partner plays, now won't you? Working out what Declarer has; where's their weakness? In fact, do this anyway: all the time. Otherwise you're only playing half the game."

COUNT YOURSELF LUCKY

I don't see" said Dag the Romulan, "what difference it makes knowing how many of a suit your partner holds. I want to know where their Aces are!"

Spock chuckled to himself. "But what if partner holds no Aces?"

"Then I wanna know about Kings, Queens, whatever. It's all about the big cards anyway."

"Not at all!" countered Spock firmly. "On the contrary there are a lot of situations where you need to know how many of a suit partner has, simply so you can work out how many cards DECLARER has in a particular suit. Think about it. You're defending a slam and at trick 12, you have so far won one trick and need another one to defeat the contract. You now hold  QD and QH, both of which you know to be winners. Declarer leads a Club. Which Queen do you discard? Is it a guess? Do you toss a coin? Is one suit prettier than the other? How on earth can we know?"

"It's always a guess in those situations," said the Romulan. "50 - 50."

"No, " said Spock, "In fact if you play properly with your partner it is NEVER a guess. Why? Because partner should show you the length in each of their suits so it is known to you exactly what Declarer's distribution is, so you know exactly which Q to keep and so defeat the contract. Letting slams slide through is always a disaster."

"How can partner tell me all that without kickin' me under the table? That's ridiculous."

"Very simply. When you follow suit, both of you should always play a High card followed by a Low card to show an even number in a suit. This is called a Peter. Now if you know partner has 2 or 4 in a particular suit, you can see how many you and dummy hold so you can soon tell how many Declarer is likely to hold by subtracting that number from 13."

"What if they hold an Odd number - 3 or 5, say?"

"Then you don't Peter. You play the cards from Low to High instead."

It's a good idea to train yourself to do this all the time - in every suit. So it naturally becomes a habit to count out Declarer's shape. Then you'll never have to guess again which Q to keep!

ENTERPRISE ATTACK

Three weeks out from Arcturus V, Spock was mentoring the Enterprise Team for the Intergalactic Pairs Championships. His message was simple:

"Let us not think of defence: let us think of attack. Attack is the best form of defence.  In any battle in military history the side with greater teamwork will triumph. You must work together with partner - not alone in magnificent but ultimately doomed isolation.

When we lose an auction one of the opponents becomes Declarer. We must not then subside into a world of dreary defence. We must, in concert with partner, ATTACK the declarer. We have one small advantage. We only have to take care of our own hand; Declarer has to work simultaneously with both his side's hands."

" 'Ang on, 'ang on, 'ang on," interrupted a cockney character who only appears in the background of Episode 6 (Mudd's Women)  " 'Ow come, guvnor, it's easier for us who can only see one 'and? I'd ravver see two anyday, know what I mean?"

"But you can see two hands. You have the advantage that you can see one of the Declaring sides hands. The declarer, on the other hand, can see neither of your defensive - sorry, attacking - hands. Therefore you and your partner can communicate in subtle underhand ways. You can pass information, like secret policemen, about what you hold in each suit so you may thwart Declarer."

"I s'pose, " chirped the cockney, "that'd be the Thwart Police, eh?"

"An interesting example of Earth humour. However, my intention is to enlighten you on the Three Paths of Signalling. And these three Paths are: Count: Attitude and Suit Preference. With these three weapons we can wreak havoc against the citadel of The Contract.

That's all for now. I shall be taking a break in the Holo-Deck, but on my return I will endeavour to show you how to walk the Three Paths of Signalling.

Live Long and Prosper!"

ALICE AND THE KING

"So tell me," said Alice surveying the wreckage of the tea party, "When should a King cover a Queen?"

"As often as possible!" guffawed the Mad Hatter.

"Don't be so rude!" squawked Alice.

"Relax. Have some more of the Herbal Tea," smiled the dozy Dormouse.

"No, I'm sorry, I'm absolutely serious." said Alice seriously.

"Never a truer word.." said the Hatter.

"The thing is, one always says one should always cover an Honour with an Honour, when that Honour is led from one's right. But is that always so? Aren't there any times at all when it could be wrong to do so?" asked Alice.

The Hatter, the Dormouse and the March Hare looked at each other quizzically, raised a forefinger to their lips and looking skyward all said: " Hmmm."
"Hmmm what then? What Hmmm? What's with the quizzical hmmming?"

"You see, "said the March Hare lugubriously, "It all depends."

"That's right, so right," said the Hatter. "Everything always depends on everything else, don't you know?"

"There's no earthly point in stomping off like that, Alice dear." Said the Hare. "I will attempt to explain. If declarer has Qxx in dummy and plays the Q you definitely should play your K. The idea is to promote a lower card in your partner's hand - such as the 10 or J. If however dummy's suit is QJxx you should - in general - not cover the Q but wait until the J is played and then cover that. i.e. cover the second honour in a sequence. On top of that you need to be beware of what Declarer's shape might be. A trap for the unwary is this one:

Dummy has QJ10x and the Q is led. You hold Kxxx. If you can see the possibility that Declarer may hold either Ax or A singleton then you should NEVER cover at all!"

"Just what I said," said the Hatter. "It all depends! Maybe I could sell you a Thinking Hat, Alice, dear?"

Defend Or Die

“Watson! Over here,” said master sleuth, Sherlock Holmes. His eyes burned with unnatural fire. I edged to the table and saw him peruse thirteen cards spread on rich maroon velvet:

6 4 2

10 9 5 3

Q 3

J 7 5 2

“Familiar, Watson?”

“Erm, er, yes, er, sort of. Yes.” I blustered.

“A hand held by you only yesterday at Madame Fifi’s.”

“Just so. A fine evening, by the way…”

“Possibly. The opponents edged to 3NT. I led a small Diamond, you played the Q, Declarer winning the Ace. Do you recall further events?”

“Indeed I do Holmes…”

“No, Watson – about this hand. Concentrate.”

“Ah. As I now recall, Declarer rattled off winners and actually made 6NT in the end, a pretty bad score for us. A deeply boring little hand I’d say. What’s the purpose of it?”

“The purpose is that, yes, indeed we did attain a bad score, but it was eminently avoidable. Consider the facts: you have a hand of almost no trick-taking potential whatsoever. But this does NOT mean, my dearest friend, you can allow yourself to be diverted from the task in hand; which is: – to make certain Declarer makes only those tricks to which he is, by chance of the deal, entitled to. And no more”
“But Holmes,” I protested feebly, “What was I to do?”

“What you had to do was think, man, think! If you do not hold many cards – where are the other points, eh? Tell me that.”

“They might have been underbid…”

“Do not – ever – take the opposition for fools. No, Watson, if you have not the points then logically I have the outstanding high cards. I therefore am the one of us who is under pressure. I need help. All the assistance I can get so as to determine which of my cards I may dispense with as required. In order to do this I need YOU to carefully and accurately inform me of your various holdings in each suit. They may be of no interest to you, but they are of profound importance to me, and I, Watson am your beloved partner.”

“Oh, I say.”

“You randomly played the lowest card from each suit according to whim and fancy, therefore denying me any small chance of gleaning such information about your hand as I needed. Had you played small from an odd number of cards and Hi-Lo from an even number, I would have been able to imagine the shape of declarer’s hand and so know what not to discard, thereby saving a trick and many Match Points. On top of that, you discarded a low Club at some point, thereby enabling Declarer to make his lowly 10 of Clubs for the 12^th trick. Lazy, Watson. Deeply lazy. Just because your hand is bad does not entitle you to park your brain in the stables. We are a partnership. You must do your work in conjunction with mine. Two needless overtricks were frittered away and an average score became a complete and total bottom!”

“Talking of bottoms….”